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Chris Stuckmann reviews Den of Thieves, starring Gerard Butler, Pablo Schreiber, O’Shea Jackson Jr., Brian van Holt, 50 Cent. Directed by Christian Gudegast.
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Show us your tattoos!!! You got new ones!
I can tell you why…for some people, it’s the actors in it that make all the difference in the world. I didn’t see Heat for that very reason. Also was never interested in The Godfather for that reason. And because this cast of actors were in it, that’s why I saw it. I might be the only person on the planet who hasn’t seen Orange Is The New Black, but I did remember Pablo Schreiber from the intense bad guy recurring role on SVU and he was the main reason I wanted to see this. And, yes, despite all his body tattoos, I got a little lady boner for him each time he was on screen cuz his character wasn’t just some eye candy…he was CLEVER with the elaborate plans and all the last minute details for when unexpected things happened. I wasn’t that fond of the ending, either, but the prom date scene was necessary to show how there was an actual family bond with the guys…that they weren’t just a bunch of thug for hire dudes who didn’t know each other outside of work. It also provided a much needed break of comedy from all the tenseness prior. Also needed a moment to showcase some skin since there wasn’t any nudity in the movie. Seriously, what mom wears a dress that skanky to greet her teenage daughter’s boyfriend at the door?? But don’t even get me started on how actor guys can be all sorts of shapes and sizes and still get roles, but unless there’s a specific storyline dealing with weight, all of the actor girls are always size 2 and under. Those parts were insignificant enough that they could have been played by any actress. I would have found it more entertaining to see Gerard’s character have a wife that WAS heavyset so when she did her attacks on him it would have been more believable. Instead it was just a baby Chihuahua going after a full grown bull. Anyway, I loved it and that’s great that it mimicked Heat. But I still won’t watch that. 🙂
Chris you have some the best shirts. Where do you shop, please tell me
This is the guy who gave The Force Awakens an A+, but now he’s hung up on Den of Thieves being a rip off. Hahaha, I cannot even begin to imagine what goes on inside his head!
Do you let your wife know she’s about to get stuckmannized every time before you smash?
Meh, just because its a rip off doesn’t mean its bad. We all liked COD 2, Star Wars 7, and Starcraft/Warcraft.
They even did the color pallet of Michael Mann movies. Lol
Heat is great because of its clever writing, unique directional style by Michael Mann, and the actors. This movie has none of that.
god please stop saying helmed. directed is fine.
Meanwhile in video games industry call of duty copy itself for 10 years and fans are happy
Transmorphers sounds like it would be in the porn store
Sorry so many holes in the movie never introduced all the ppl and the ending was a cheap oceans trilveenough))lol? L
Great review!
Review Akeelah and the Bee
So basically if you’ve never seen the movie heat you’ll love everything about it.
Why didn’t you review Bright?
Heat should never be fucked with. The shoot out in Heat was the most realistic sounding ever.
No bad January movies yet
So when Star Wars The Force awakens Ripoff The New Hope you say “that you love the movie that it is in your top 3 star wars movie” you never said anything about that is a copy of a new hope…. so now you are the great critic saying that Den Of Thieves is a ripoff of Heat…. you are clearly a fanboy of starwars… fanboys reviews are equeal to nothing…
Watch the open house on netflix
Can you and will you review Le Samouraï (1967) French noir masterpiece?
Hey, why don’t you review Heat??
Are you going to review hostiles?
I really really liked this movie. Very entertaining.
you really look like chris pratt
I hate how they advertised the twist in this movie like “don’t miss the twist you won’t see coming” like no shit it’s a twist of course we won’t see it coming
Be interesting to see what someone who hasn’t see heat thought..
Marty Scorsese ripped off Infernal Affairs… and won an Oscar for it. Andrew Lau’s original film was awesome
The Heat for Dummies
You sound like a douche trying to be like a Variety critic.